Operation Cold Turkey Pacifier Drop

Before Molly was born, I was pretty dead-set against using pacifiers. Though I would never say so out loud (knowing that there was a lot I didn't know and wanting to avoid having to eat my words), I had no intention of giving Molly a pacifier...ever.

And then she was born and, for those first days in the hospital, we spent her every waking moment holding one of our pinky fingers in her mouth. She had such an insatiable urge to suck. But in the hospital it didn't seem like such a big deal because she slept so much, and it's not like we had anything better to do.

When we got home and had the option of doing other things, like making ourselves dinner or even just changing the channel on the TV, constantly holding a finger in her mouth became impractical (and uncomfortable). Finally my mom urged me to just try a pacifier and, though it was my own stubbornness that had prevented me from trying that before, I was so very grateful for the suggestion.

[Of course, my daughter has inherited my (and her father's) stubbornness and was extremely picky about what kind of pacifier she would take. Only Nuk for her thank you very much.]

I quickly became a pacifier convert, appreciative of the fact that we could eat out without having to go through a long process of calming her down. And in the beginning I was purposeful in only using it when absolutely necessary. But as she got older, I realized that Molly had been conditioned to expect her pacifier when she voiced her displeasure. I began to dread the day we would have to get rid of the stupid plastic things.

Ideally, I would have started to get rid of the pacifier when Molly turned a year old. But having a Christmas Eve birthday means there's a lot of traveling around her birthday, and I didn't want to change up Molly's norm anymore than we already were by being on the go. Plus, when we got home we were starting the process of weaning. So the pacifier stayed around.

But I found myself get increasingly annoyed with my own use of the pacifier while simultaneously noticing that Molly seemed to be depending on it more and more often. The bigger problem, to me, was (once again) her stubbornness. Even if I only gave Molly her pacifier in moments of extreme need, she would refuse to let it out of her sight or let it be taken away afterword. It seemed like we were using the pacifier more and more rather than less and less, especially after she cut five new teeth in one weekend.

Then this past Friday something amazing happened. Without planning or forethought, Molly went the entire afternoon without her pacifier. I didn't even realize it until bedtime. And it wasn't even that she hadn't used it. She had been in an amazing mood without it (not necessarily because she was without it, but still). A crazy, spontaneous idea hit me while Dave was giving Molly her bath. We were going cold turkey.

[This, you should know, is completely unlikely me. I am a third degree black belt planner. In fact, my previous get-rid-of-the-pacifier plan included a four-month progress, slowly cutting the pacifier out of Molly's life. That is much more like me.]

But I figured, what the hell? She is an excellent sleeper, so I actually wasn't terribly worried how she would do without it at night. (She's still nursing at bedtime, and she usually falls asleep nursing - though not always - and I decided we would let that work in our favor.) So I decided that we would go all night without, and if that went well, we would try to go the next day without it, too.

I wasn't obstinately convinced of my plan (as is often my way), but I was willing to give it a go. If it seemed to be a nightmare, we'd go by to my (overly thought-out) plan.

The next morning, Molly woke up in a great mood. Astoundingly great, in fact. Whereas she usually acts like she's still tired and cuddles on the couch with me for a half hour or so, she immediately wanted to play in her room, laughing the whole time. She even let me change her diaper without a fight (a huge win for Operation Cold Turkey Pacifier Drop).

And, much to my shock, she stayed in that same mood all day. Yes, there were a few trying moments, but they were much, much shorter than I had ever expected them to be and they really only seemed trying for me. Though I would immediately start doubting my parenting skills (why can't I comfort her without a pacifier?), Molly bounced right back. She went down for her nap like she had never slept with a pacifier. We even went out to eat without the dreaded public meltdown. All-in-all, it was a great day.

:::

I know this might be me projecting, but it seemed like Molly was happier without her pacifier. She certainly vocalized her happiness more often. It was wonderful to see her huge smile all day long rather than just when she happened not to have her pacifier.

Admittedly, this is not the end of the story. It's only day two. And on day one we were careful to avoid situations that would be more likely to create a meltdown, situations that won't always be avoidable. I am particularly dreading dealing with her next bout of teething without a pacifier. But if the past 36 hours of told me anything, it's that (for my child, at this time in her life) it is so worth it.